Draft 5

Here are my Penultimate Drafts for my music magazine.


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This is the Youtube Video Clip on where my feedback was given by my teacher on my penultimate drafts to look upon.

Overall, my magazine was good however, analyzing the feedback I have set myself some final targets for me to implement in the redrafting of my magazine before the submission date which has been set.

Final Targets :

  • I was told that on my front cover page that I need to change the font on the ‘star name’ as it looked too similar to the masthead, and the conventions of a front page require the masthead to be unique and stand out above everything on the front page.
  • Also on my front page in order for the masthead to stand out, I was told to change the colors so the masthead has it’s own unique style/color, for example on the ‘star name’ and ‘cover lines’ this is where I’ll implement this feedback.
  • On both the front cover page as well as the contents page was that I still had placeholder and convention text on the page, and was told that I need to have the final elements and content done, which will be done on my redraft.
  • In my contents page I had caption text on my image wasn’t suitable and didn’t match the conventions of magazine which was the mentioning of unknowns therefore, I have to reword my caption in my redraft.
  • On my double page spread, I had my pictures in text which on the end result had a white large border around it which ruined the double page spread, I have to crop the borders on the image to make it look unique and stand out.


In order to make the presentation for our pages for our music magazine aesthetically pleasing we are required to implement another page which will go between the cover and the contents page, this page will be a full page advertisement. The reason for this implementation is for a technical reason of exporting our finished magazine pages into a specific presentation software for our music magazine which will layout our pages as a magazine. However, I understand that we won’t be marked on this advert, but in terms of presentation having this extra page of an advert will help the presentation software process run more efficiently. It will be useful on the pretext of this task to go back and to make sure to have a complete understanding of my target audience. My audience based on my audience research in terms of demographics was male adult ages between 18-24, in terms of politics my audience being on the right wing of the spectrum and professions included things like the sports industry which where my advert coincides with my target audience, therefore the advert would perfectly fit my magazine due to the reasoning of the demographics matching my target audience with the advert that I have chosen. As a result I have chosen this Adidas advert and the caption perfectly describes my music star as well as it resulting in meeting my audience demographics and would fit perfectly into my music magazine.

I have also included a music tour poster as another advert for my magazine, the genre is the same as the one of my magazine, I particularly enjoyed the design of the cover therefore me choosing it, I feel that my audience would be suited to similar genre poster and would meet in my aim of meeting my target audience.


Language Analysis

The magazine article that I am analysing is called ‘Cash For Questions’, the name of the magazine is the ‘Q’ music magazine, the date of the article/magazine is September 2017 and the author of the article is Paul Stokes. I have chosen to analyze this article due to the reason that I will like to implement a Q&A content into my double page spread, I feel the Q&A format would be most suitable for my double page spread as I would be able to reach my target audience via this format. It was a simple article to read, it wasn’t complex, which allowed the reader to maintain the desire to read the article and carry on reading the article.

In the beginning of the article the journalist lays down big names in particular Miley Cyrus and David Cameron being the former prime minister of England, this is useful and effective in grabbing the audience’s attention and to read the article. The journalist includes on the ‘Standfirst’ some irony/amusement ‘why they’re against dishwashers’ which can be felt through the presence of the journalist in that particular line in terms of what the audience feels about that line for example the tone of the line, in addition the use ellipses at the end of the line the purpose of that is to lead the audience on, to read the article throughout.

The journalist sets the scene of the article by the article stating near the beginning ‘With over 200,000 of the oldest books in Ireland’, then ‘Trinity College Dublin’s The Long Room’ which paints the picture of visually where Alt-J are. That provides what the surroundings of where the journalist and alt-j are and where the interview is taking place.

Artists love to do Q&A as the answer to do there questions allow them to express there personality via the questions asked in addition the answers that the artists provide would communicate to his/hers star image to make there image or brand more established and recognisable. This allows the artists to establish themselves in both there brand or image as well as there personality which is why a Q&A interview is liked by artists due to those reasons and there star image being expanded.

The structure of the article is that it is a Q&A, the questions have been presented to the artists by the audience/readers. There is a variation of questions being asked by the audience and the presence of the journalist is being made aware by the use in the questions for example, ‘People have criticised alt-j for being nerdy. To dispel that, tell us the worst trouble you got in at school’ the use of us provides the presence of the journalist alongside the audience. It makes the audience feel more involved with the article which would enable them to be more intrigued to the article.

Here is the image of the article :

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Draft 4 Feedback and Targets

I was given Feedback based on all drafts that I did of my front cover,contents page and double page spread by our teacher and was given constructive feedback to improve my drafts via a Youtube video clip here is the link to it below.


FRONT PAGE –  The feedback I was given on my front page draft was that I should change the colour of the stroke on the masthead or just change the style in general as the colour of the stroke as it loses the impact that I am trying the convey of my genre of pop. I should also change the font of the star name as it is the same as the masthead font as well as the main cover line which doesn’t match the conventions of a front page of which I was made aware by my teacher in this feedback. Also I should implement another font which I was told by my teacher, in addition, implementing more of a variety of colours into my front cover would be better and beneficial for my front page.

CONTENTS PAGE – The feedback that I was given on my contents page draft was that it was a similar theme in comparison to my front page, however, I have included a new image and was told that It wasn’t suitable in terms of where I placed the image and that I should look to re position the image somewhere else. Also that I should crop/move my model in on the page, and try to be more inventive with my images. Furthermore, I need to include more articles in contrast to the conventions of a content page there are many articles which is something that I would need to do and include on my contents page. The colour of pink was favoured by my teacher followed by the white stroke.

DOUBLE PAGE SPREAD – The feedback that I was given on my double page spread draft was that I had implemented words repetitively which is something that I will have to change in addition the headline wasn’t favoured massively by my teacher which is also something I will probably need to change. The picture which I had used DTP in particular Photoshop was liked by my teacher and the way which I manipulated the image was great. I should change the way of the box images that I have included and that I should be more inventive with the images and also that I should change the size of the pull quote that I have implemented. Capital Letters at the beginning of the paragraphs was liked by my teacher however I should be more consistent with that particular element embedding it throughout the main body text of the double page spread.

Overall, I was told that the designs were similar to each other which is something that I will work on to change in terms of some colours used and with more drafts I will aim to improve my next drafts.


Feedback on Article



This is my peer feedback voice memo on my article:

Targets for development :

  • Have more content in the article, maybe include some more questions to extend the article.
  • Introduce a variety of language for example figurative language such as personification which would express his personality as an individual, or a simile could be implemented to suggest also what he is like as an individual.
  • Make some of the content in the article more entertaining for example what he gets up to in his free time or how he lives his life which is different and more thrilling to a regular person’s life and embedding it throughout the article which would intrigue the audience to read on the whole article.


Article Idea Development

Whilst creating my article I will have to think about how I approach it, and the idea that I will have behind it. A hook is a fair proportion of the article and with that in mind I will have to consider which conventions are included in a hook and what it will be in my article in relation to my artist :

Who are you writing for?

In terms of the audience that I am aiming to reach in terms of age I would be looking to achieve the age range of 18-24 and this is based of my audience research that I had from YouGov and I know based from my research that this age range are most into this genre of music. In terms of gender based on my audience research ideally male’s are more into the my genre of music so how textually construct my layout will have to appeal to my audience in this department. I will have to consider possible other interests of my audience for example things which I could use which is provided by my research is find connotations in terms of my audience favorite TV shows for example and see what relatable content that I could and dissect from it and try and integrate ideas for my audience.

What is important to your audience?

What is important for me as to what I’m trying to communicate to my audience is that I’m aiming to show people about my upcoming artist to reach a wider audience and more people to be more aware of this artist. In addition, what is important to my audience is that they will read this section of the magazine if they are interested into music they would value it more and find it more appealing as that’s what interest them.

What news is currently trending?

I will have take into account the latest news which is trending at the current period of time, I will have textually will have to try and relate the content in my article to the latest trending topics which could potentially grab more more people into reading and taking the time to look at the article that I have written. Consequently, I will have to try and implement some trending news which would appeal to my audience and ensure it will meet there needs in terms of latest and trending content.

How are you going to start?

The way to start an article is that there are various ways for example a great hook involves starting with a subject, what I am writing about and why it would matter to my audience for example. Another ways include potentially asking a question, introduce a reader with a statistic or fact, or in contrast start with a quote from the who the article is about.

Feedback & Reflection on Draft 3

Below is my draft for double page spread, In terms of feedback on Draft 3 being my double page spread I was given feedback from my peers and teachers to see what there views were on my first draft attempt.

WWW – In terms of feedback that I was given was that they liked the layout and the structure of the double page spread that all the elements. The conventions of a double page spread was constructed well on my double page spread. I was told by my peers as well as my teacher that the font on the title suited the double page spread and looked good.

EBI – However, feedback that I was also given which will be my targets for development to improve my double page spread is terms of content in the text to not be repetitive. Furthermore, I should experiment more with my images that I have placed and to try implement new ideas into my double page spread, and have more consistency in terms of the text and visually on how it looks.

A New Improved Double Page Spread – This is my double page spread, based on the feedback that I was given, I felt that the way which I’ve constructed it is that I am happy with the changes that I made was in the title to give it a clean style and felt it suits the genre of my music magazine and felt that I don’t need to make any other changes to do.

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oZgRY0JIT8c – This is the youtube video clip where my teacher gave me feedback on drafts.

A New Improved Contents Page

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This is my improved contents page, after taking into consideration my peer feedback that I was given, I have changed the color scheme of my contents page to the opposite of my background on to the text in contrast to the initial pink that I previously had. I made these changes because of the peer feedback that was given to me therefore resulting me to make changes on my contents page. I feel that my contents page looks better as it is the color scheme is the same as the background and have implemented the white stroke to embolden the text which is present.

Feedback & Reflection on Draft 2

Below is my draft for my contents page, In terms of feedback on Draft 2 being my contents page from my peers I was told that I should change the font of the title to suit the front page so there is a consistent front which portrays a professional layout. I was also told by my peers that they liked the colors scheme on the content page which matches the genre of pop, as well as the effect around my model of the distorted effect, in addition the inset that I have included was favored by my peers.

In terms of reflection I know what elements I will have to change from the peer feedback that I was given and will now look forward to implementing the feedback that I was given to make a new improved contents page, I will have to improve the contents page given on the areas of feedback. The areas on feedback which I have been given is to change the color scheme so it isn’t similar to my front cover in terms of the color scheme and that should mix up the color which is what I will do on my improved contents page.

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