The embedded video is a Screen-Castify from our teacher giving us feedback on draft 2 of our music video. Below I am going to bullet point the feedback that we received.
- Good opening shot in slow mo
- Nice to connect with the star as the lyrics begin
- Good connection with the lipstick in mirror then on the actor
- Nice close-up montage of getting ready
- The shot with a close-up of Sophie’s eyes works well
- Shot of Sophie sat on the rock hugging her legs works well
- Fabric through the frame shots are framed nicely – work well & look effective
- Close-ups that we have work really well
- Likes the fourth wall break at the end
- Good framing
- A clear, effective narrative
Targets For Improvement:
- Make first lip-syncing shot a bit longer
- Would be good to do match-on-action with the lipstick shot at the start.
- Close-up of photo when girl looks to photo
- Maybe add a filter to flashbacks to show that the girl in reminiscing
- Close-up of star’s hair cascading down her back – pick-up shot if needed
- Pulling photos down – pick-up shot – make it a close-up – match-on-action
- More singing close-ups/fabric through frame shot
- Close-up of ripping the photo – demonstrate the importance of this moment, also a close-up of objects flying through the air after they’ve been swiped off the table
- Nice to see what is happening on the phone – will shoot a screen recording and do a split screen between actor on the phone and the screen recording of what she is seeing.
- More cuts to anxious. facial expressions
- Don’t over use the waves – only reference that once – waves will be replaced with other abstract shots such as rocks tumbling from a stack or a hand hitting sand into the air.
- More obvious signs that the phone has flashed in the mirror
- Pan/dolly around fabric through frame/pan or dolly around the star whilst singing so that it is not so static
- Gain more match-on-actions detailing pivotal moments – more close-ups