Music Video Draft 4

This is our draft four of our music video that we have constantly been tweaking and editing to create the best version that we can possibly make. What has changed in this video is that we have finally filled in the blanks so that we have a completed video from start to finish. We have also looked again at the text over the video and we think that regardless of the previous peer comments; the text creates a different medium and appears to be more targeting to the character and makes him look even more guilty as it looks like he is being scolded.

Below we have feedback of one of our peers assessing our draft four of what she likes and dislikes about the music video,so we have created a screen castify to capture her discussing her views and opinions of the video.

Our targets from our peer is that there is one main part where the lip syncing is slightly off and could easily be corrected.


Teacher feedback

Our teacher has watched our 2nd draft of our music video to give us feedback on the elements of it that needs more developing and the parts that we have done well, knowing this enables us to reflect back on the video from another person’s point of view.


What went well:

What needs improving/ideas to enhance video:

  • Quite a fast opening, a lot to take in
  • Good close ups
  • Could get Harry closer to Sal to show a connection
  • More reference to lights
  • Blue bin in the way of running shot of Harry
  • 180 degree rule almost is not applied in a few shots
  • Start with a close up or some angle that gives a connection to Sal and the audience
  • Is the text supposed to be there? If so, is it conventional?
  • Beautifully framed
  • Quality of harry close up doesn’t appear as good as the other shots (which is because of a grainy effect)
  • Harry is a bit smiley in one of the shots
  • Slow down the clip of Sal  
  • Good cuts for pace
  • Needs match on action- he was past the bin last time
  • Strong performer
  • She knows the lyrics well 
  • More cuts nearer the end to create energy
  • More lip gloss needed on the close up
  • For the shot of him stabbing, need to get in there and create fast pace
  • Getting the shot of the police car is brilliant and very conventional
  • Need a recurring theme of blue lights
  • Good narrative but needs more cut to reaction and match on action
  • Need a long shot of her, as it is all very stationary
  • Sal in streets by her self singing?

Now after reading and going over these comments, we understand that we need to figure out whether we need another shoot to get in more blue lights and more shots to cut to; or we could just improve our editing skills in Premiere Pro, so for example we can play around with the colours of the clips and maybe add a blue light effect. However, if we don’t know how to do this, we can research tutorials on YouTube. 

Audience Ideologies

To make sure we cater for our audience we have deeply researched the type of person that would love our music video, and what reasons they have for consuming media such as Instagram and YouTube. Theorists that understood this important factor were Blumler and Katz who explained that there were four uses and gratifications, their theory further illustrates an active audience and  four reasons for why and how people consume media, which are: Information, Personal Identity, Social Interaction and entertainment. Therefore, I have looked on a site that I have previously used called YouGov and searched for the typical people that would enjoy R&B and the site Instagram, In which you can see the outcome below, where they are a female between the ages of 18-24 that live mainly around urban areas such as London/Manchester/Brighton etc:

After researching this, I have created a fake dating profile of the typical audience, and have included what they like, their passions such as her favourite music (which is our genre) and primary information. Stuart Hall was a theorist that discussed how the audience can reject the ideas if they strain too far from the typicality of the genre, this is called ‘Oppositional’, however when the ideas are accepted is is labelled ‘Preferred’, so in result of this theory I have made sure that I take in what ideas that would be rejected by the audience, such as; if the music video had more heavy rock themes rather than R&B.


Draft 3

Many things have improved in this video due to the constant learning of how to create effects and edits for the video, so what we have added (clip-wise) is the footage of the treacle being poured on him so that the metaphor of paranoia can be produced. Our teacher also commented on the previous draft explaining that the narrative was quite confusing because you don’t see who he murdered so we put in the footage of the victim walking past and Harry watching him as we found as it made more logical sense. (You can see this at 2:09).

Another element of the feedback that we considered, was the point that the audience don’t really have enough time to see the clip of the screwdriver as we didn’t put in a slower close up in the previous drafts, nevertheless, we made sure to put it in in this draft (3) to show improvement of the video- and now watching it, it works really well and is more clear. this can be found at 2:13.

Also, we have put in many effects to make the video look more interesting, such as the overlapping echo effect, a grain effect to show his mind isn’t clear, and created a glitch to represent that somethings wrong and that reality is distorted for him.

To truly understand the pros and cons of our video we have had peers to comment below what they think works well and what could be improved; hearing their views has made me realise a few things, such as maybe the metaphor of the paranoia (treacle) covering isn’t quite as clear as we thought it would be. On the other hand, we have had many comments about the editing to the beat and about the strong performer really makes you believe she’s singing.

(Click on images to see more clearly) 

After reading these, I have now created personal targets which are:

  • Continue with the editing to captivate audience
  • Look at different fonts for the text over the video ‘needs to be more distinct’
  • Need to think about how I can make the metaphor more clear
  • Need to fill in the rest of the video as we have not fully completed it yet.

Shoot Evaluation- Narrative

Overall, reflecting back on the shoot, I think that we were very organised in the sense of: time, locations, props and the footage we got.  Also making sure that we stuck to the 180 degree rule and used the rule of thirds in the majority of our shots so that we can gain the best outcome to our abilities.

Throughout the year of learning about cinematography, it has enabled both of us to understand how to make a video more intriguing to the target audience; such as communicating meaning so that they want to end up watching more of it, this is why we have made sure to film many shots and angles of him looking worried to make the audience wonder and ask ‘why?’.

Below are images that I took on the shoot that show a great example of distances that we used to make sure our video didn’t consist of just the same angles; as it would seem repetitive and would lose the interest of our audience.



  • Tripods leg broke so had some shaky footage
  • Could do with more match on action shots i.e when he reads the threatening note
  • The camera wasn’t screwed in properly therefore wobbled now and then (however only affected a few shots)


  • Good variation of angles and shots
  • Followed our story board
  • We got coverage and filmed more than we needed just in case

Targets: Our main target that we discussed was to check all the equipment is not faulty before we take it out filming for when we film the treacle scene which we plan to show flashes of throughout the music video to represent the paranoia.

Draft 2- includes Narrative


This is our second draft of the music video, and a lot has changed since our first draft which were just cuts of the performance with no music, we have also added in the narrative to it that we have filmed recently so that we now editing both the narrative and performance shows that the video’s coming together; which you can see in the video above. However the blank parts in the video still needs to be filled in by other footage that has not been filmed yet- which is of the actor getting dark treacle poured over him throughout the video to represent the paranoia taking over him.

The elements that I like and think we did well were:

  • The rythm of the editing to music
  • Lip syncing was in time
  • Good variation of shots
  • Clarity of footage
  • Great representation of paranoia by using different angels to capture reaction.
  • 1:22-1:26 shows good editing to create a sense of anger

And what I didn’t like:

  • Needs more fast pace editing when it comes to him killing the man etc
  • To put in the long shot of her walking to the curtains
  • Some performance shots are too long and may lose the interest of the audience
  • At 1:20 minutes the camera gets knocked
  • Need to get the footage of the performer on the phone and the scenes of him being covered in treacle
  • The editing of 2:28 to 2:35 needs to bet cut faster as it needs to be a panic and a high pace scene.

Overall, my targets that need to be more focused on are to get the missing treacle footage shot, and of her on the phone as soon as possible so that we don’t waste all our time editing without all the shots.

Narrative Risk Assessment

Creating a risk assessment for the filming of our narrative for the music video makes sure that we evaluate any hazards possible, and so that the shoot goes as smooth as possible. We have included the specific risks in this document and how they will be controlled to enable safe filming. The person/actor that we are using to film in our narrative is over eighteen; so we have just asked for his permission as you can see he has signed in the image above.

Production Meeting Agenda- Narrative Shoot

The production meeting agenda allows us to be further organised for the narrative shoot when talking about: dates, times, props and clothing etc.  As you can see in the attached  document; we have covered all of these things, not forgetting the location and who is bringing what, so that nothing is forgotten on the day and that it runs fluently without any mishaps or faults.


Narrative Storyboard

Vikki and I, have created a story board of post-it notes that have rough sketches and written examples of the variations of shots that we want to get when we film our narrative part of the music video, to show a graphical representation. What this helps us with is to be able to have an over-view of the video to visualise the flow of shots that we have and see if they work well and allows us to be able to check whether we have any shots missing and moreover enables us to put down any new ideas before we film and miss any potential angles.

We need to think of as many elements that we can think of such as cut to close ups, match on action, framing, distances and many more to help tell our story to the audience. Storyboards are used in pre-production, production as well as post-production. This is because before production it is created like a plan or blueprint to follow; as the theorist Lacey explained through his ‘Repertoire of Elements’. Also, the use of the storyboard in pre-production can let the directors add on and discuss any missing shots.

During production, the storyboard further plays as that blueprint to follow along whilst shooting, however, the director/s can decide if they want a different shot in the storyboard which can lead in forgetting other shots and sticking to the plan. Post production still has involvement with the storyboard as it acts as a reminder of the narrative/plan that they were following as they may have forgotten certain ideas through the process.

So, in result of learning the importance of a storyboard, we decided to take pictures of the post-it notes (as you can see in the images attached) when we film our narrative so that we have a strong guideline and don’t lead astray to our aims and objectives.

Narrative Development


Our narrative for our music video; consists of a broken relationship between a woman and a man in which he is greatly paranoid, the audience to begin with don’t know why, and because in the performance she is telling him that he is okay and reassures him-  the audience begin to believe her. However, the viewers see more and more footage of him being further abnormally worried and then see that he has committed a big crime. This uses an unrestricted perspective as the performer doesn’t know of this until later on in the song, so the audience knows information that a character doesn’t.

Looking at the structure of the majority of music videos, we have picked apart our narrative by using the three-point arc that helps us recognise what happens during the beginning, middle and end.  Also, we have established the themes and conventions that will be featured throughout the music video, (such as paranoia and trust).

The narrative can be split into two different views for the audience, in which are; restricted and unrestricted. Restricted perspective gives the audience less information and are unaware of some happenings but find out at the end, and unrestricted let’s the audience know something that a character does not.  An example of this used in our video is that we have chosen to use the unrestricted perspective because it makes the audience captivated as they would want to know the outcome, however the video can be left to the audience to decide what happens next.

After the research into the structures that are commonly found, we have noticed that they all fall under a category of the following three types of narrative- or, are a mixture: illustration- where the narrative matches the lyrics (for example; if the lyrics were ‘falling down’ the illustration would be of something or someone falling as that specific lyric is played), amplification- this is when the narrative is inspired by the themes of the lyrics, and thirdly; disjuncture is when the narrative seems to hold very little similarities to the lyrics and can be quite random.

Therefore we decided to use the amplification narrative type so that we can project those themes of paranoia and also use some aspects of illustrative narrative as it helps tell the story. In almost every narrative of a music video shows a conflict or problem that needs to be overcome by the character/s in order to restore life back to normal. This is where the narrative arc shows a good representation of how the story would usually go because at the beginning it starts off fine and how everything is normal, and as the arc begins to rise that represents a climax in a problem or conflict. When the arc is at its highest point it is called disequilibrium, and then the narrative can either stop there and leave the audience on a cliff hanger/leave it to them to interpret the rest of the narrative. Or, fix the problem and return back to normal which is then the complete arc. This will be shown in our music video when at fisrst the audience believe that he hasn’t done anything wrong but they are proven wrong in the disequilibrium as he will be seen murdering someone which will completely change the audiences’ views.

Also something that we noticed was that most of the videos were almost incomplete and left it up to the viewers to decide what happens next, this is something that we plan to do in our music video as we think that it creates an unpredictable element which is what makes them want to rewatch it to try and create possible answers. However, we do know that you want the audience to feel predictable please when watching it, so, we are sticking to we’ll known features and elements of the genre  so that they gain that feeling.