Draft 4


This is draft 4 of our music video, we added the black and white effect on the performance scenes and a red over lay to the shrine scenes. I think these changes had a really good impact on the video, it helped distinguish the different settings. We also included more of the beach shots, these are portrayed as flashbacks and I think it adds more depth to the narrative.

Targets for improvement:

Peer feedback:

  • likes the fast edits at the start.
  • She understood that the character was in distress.
  • She liked the shots of the flame where it moves across the frame.
  • She thinks the bit of the performance where the performer spins round when the word spin is sang is effective.
  • She liked the jump cuts of the girl coming towards the camera through the urban, tunnel area.
  • She liked the juxtaposition of the flashback beach scenes and the darker shrine scenes.
  • She pointed out that some shots were too shaky and that it was a bit distracting, however she understood that it fit with the genre but needs to be stabilized still.
  • needs to increase the brightness on 3.27 shot so can clearly see the lip syncing.
  • doesn’t like the bit where she shakes her head in the mirror at the chorus.


  • 1:53 shot of lips needs to be edited to black and white effect.
  • Shots need to be stabilized in premiere pro e.g ~(0.22) , (0.30) (0.41) (1.02/3) (1.11-13) (1.23)
  • The head-banging shots  in the mirror need to be replaced with different footage, maybe including flashbacks and performance.
  • One of the shots is too dark and needs to be brightened se we can see more clearly whats going on.
  • 2.41 there is a black screen which needs to be replaced with footage.


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