On Thursday the 17th and Friday the 18th of September we had two visitors from Specsavers come in and give us advice about how to improve on our music video, as one of these visitors watched our first draft he gave many points that could improve the quality and emotional tone of the narrative.
The feedback they gave was that the first draft cut was very effective and used interesting shots of the girl and portrayed the themes of failures, he stated that we needed to focus on making the stairs look even more abstract to juxtapose the naturalism of the school scenes. With improvements on what we are trying to portray to an audience and a clearer narrative in the video we can make it look extremely effective.
- think about angles and composition
- use more interesting angles
- emotions within shots
- make it confusing
- remove the context
- make it feel like just stairs
- be selective with stairs
- keep it graphical
- edit shots
- no blindfold
- make shots seem confusing
- pick a barrier and a door
List of new technical and creative ideas
- use barriers to compose shots
- use doors to give context
- overlap shots in editing
- edit the shots in effective ways
- make it abstract
- make the shots very graphical
- smoothly edit together shots for flow
- make the transitions smoother
Here are two youtube videos that would help with the second draft of our music video due to the effects and visual techniques they mention:
Embedded Draft 2 video.
Photos from shoot
Here are a few shots from the second shot of the stairs in town, we got many more better shots with improved angles.
Looking back on the first draft of our music video, I can see a clear significant improvement with tones and emotions within shots. There are many more interesting angles and camera shots that effectively link together to create an effective narrative video. I definitely feel that the narrative and story in the music video is more distinctly portrayed to the audience, with the different scenes of the abstract stairs and naturalistic shots within school really give the idea of stress and anxiety as the angles work well in conjunction to the shots.
Targets for improvement
The shoot at the school for the naturalistic scenes went well, we managed to obtain many useful shots that can be used effectively in the final cut of the music video. By filming six scenes within the school we managed to get many different types of shots and emotions for the final cut, each shot was successful and has its own mood and tone that fits the music video perfectly. By using the props that related to each scene made it look even more naturalistic to fit the narrative of the video, making the shots successful.
The girl being dressed in the same clothes as on the stairs makes a clear link to the abstract and realistic shots, every aspect in the school shots is very realistic helping to set the tone of failures and struggles in school helping it to be more relatable to a target audience.
For the final shoot on the stairs we will use the tripod more often to help get focused and steady shots, we will get more interesting and abstract shots to help provide the tone for the music video in the stair climbing scenes. More interesting angles will make the video appear more exciting and immersive for the audience to watch, giving a powerful effect of the music video.
The targets for the final shoot of the music video:
- have the camera on a tripod
- have steady shots
- make sure the shots are in focus
- Get a stronger sense of emotion
Storyboard for music video
Below is the storyboard of our plan for a filming session, this will include the scenes within the school where the female character struggles with her school life representing how many teenagers struggle in school due to stress and relationships. We hope to include effective shots and interesting angles to help make the scenes more emotive, this will help to portray the feelings in the narrative to a target audience.
The range of shots we will use to communicate the narrative to the audience we range from close ups to display the emotions to tracking shots to give the tone of stress, the different shots will help to connote the emotions in the different scenes and build up the stress and anxiety in each shot so that the target audience can understand the character in the narrative.
The narrative of the music video
Our music video narrative is 100% narrative and will be a mix of anachronic and parallel scenes, as the story portrays life struggles and scenes within a school of the female character struggling with daily life. The two different scenes will link together as the stairs will be abstract while the school scenes will be naturalistic, throughout the video the tone will get brighter as she climbs the stairs and reaches the top.
Throughout the narrative in the music video her emotional condition will slowly improve as she climbs the stairs and reaches the door at the top into success, at the beginning of the sequence the girl is struggling with her life and the situations it comes with. As she climbs the stairs throughout the video and runs to reach the positive her emotions slowly become more positive as she self reflects on her life and gains a new confidence to run for the success she desires.
The door at the end of the video will represent her final success and overcoming the difficulties she faced in her past, there will be changes from present to future as she desires to be in her brighter moment in life. This music video is very symbolic of life and how everyone has the go through the same experiences to get to the top of the metaphorical staircase that we are displaying in this music video.
This first draft of the music video in my opinion is decent but the whole presentation of the narrative could be much better and more effective. The flow of the narrative is not as smooth as I was hoping for as the shots sometimes do not line up with the narrative, the use of different shots could be explored more in the final video to give a stronger effect. The incorporation of the photos in the video give a strong effect and contrast to the lightness of the shots on the stairs, making the video more intense and sharp. There needs to be a stronger sense of journey and failure within the video and it show clearly show how the girl is getting progressively more worn out as she begins to struggle with going up the stairs, the addition of more shots of different realistic settings will help bring the music video to life for an audience.
In the final cut of the music video we will change these aspects to make the video more effective towards a teenage audience, the interoperation of the music video is very important to give a message to the viewers. The final music video can be much more powerful than this first draft and can play with a lot more shots and editing techniques to help make it as professional as it can be, I hope that when we put together our final music video that it includes all the most vital aspects. Including editing techniques, use of different shots, a well presented narrative and gives the audience excitement and the urge to watch it again.
For the final music video the shots will need to be much more clean and the narrative will need to be clearer to the audience, the editing and sequence of shots need to be easily followed by an audience.
- deeper narrative and meaning
- still photos in black and white
- close ups with blindfold
- symbolic colours with emotions of running
- make sure shots don’t show the still and cue
- get rid of lawn mower
- do not repeat shots
- need the doors, opening and closing
- connection with life and photos
- maybe add performance of lips
- sad objects in black and white
- more upside down shots of running
- shots of someone singing