June 11

Feedback From Teacher

Here is some feedback from our teacher, our targets given were:

  • Start with a close up to connect the audience with the singer,
  • Edit the rose scene as he gives it twice, improve the match on action,
  • More CU’s of the rose to show the connection,
  • Hold the reaction shot for longer,
  • Cut to his reaction,
  • More reaction shots,
  • More CU’s to show connection and clarity,
  • POV of her swinging on the swing,
  • CU of Brooks hand pushing her on the swing,
  • MS/CU of the ‘classic kiss’ between the two characters,
  • Get rid of the long shot of Lucy dancing on the balcony,
  • Tracking shot of them walking through the flower pathway,
  • Walking towards the camera and transitioning through to the next shot,
  • When they fall have a handheld canted angle as though the camera is tumbling with them and the audience will then connect with them,
  • The continuity doesn’t work when they walk across the screen as they fell beforehand,
  • CU of the dog,
  • Cut to narrative when she’s not singing words, so when she sings ‘ooh’,
  • CU of him pushing Lucy away,
  • Make it more obvious that he has left her within the narrative,
  • Look into his eyes when she sings ‘when I look into his eyes’,
  • Make a more obvious link as the why she throws the jumper back at him, ensure the audience know it is his jumper,
  • More connection between the couple,
  • Tracking and Dolly of the picnic box and opening of packets etc,
  • Add another significant flower, so that there is 3,
  • Add more symbolism between the flowers,
  • At the end she could press the flower into the photo book and we can turn the page to show the pressed flower to show a running light motive throughout, that glues it all together,
  • Focus more on the idea of them breaking up,
  • Display clearly the deterioration of their relationship,
  • Make the story more obvious earlier on, before she’s started singing about it,
  • Running symbolism throughout of the picking of the petals, the classic, ‘he loves me, he loves not’, this can represent the classic symbol of a relationship being on then off.

Elements she liked were:

  • Our editing to the beat on ‘live it up, live it up, live it up, now baby’,
  • The smelling of the rose shot,
  • The amount of close ups,
  • Filmed well,
  • The lip sync,
  • Cut to CU and match on action of Brook’s hands on Lucy’s hips,
  • Shot of Lucy on the swing,
  • The close up of her crying and mascara down her face,
  • Mise-en-scene with the picnic box etc…,
  • The use of flowers within the narrative,
  • The clarity of our shots,
  • The performance shots.


Posted 11th June 2018 by scarlettplampton in category Music Video

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