These are the adverts that I have decided to include in my magazine, I’ve chosen to use these two adverts for I feel that this is what my target audience would consume, as my target audience are rock music fans and their age range is mainly from early to late 20’s. The help me decide what adverts to use I used yougov and looked at the magazine Kerrang! that I thought is similar to mine to see what their audience is interested in so I could base what my audience is interested off that.
- Add extra effect to the banner
- Change the plugs font
- Add something to the pug to make it stand out more.
- Place the text better in the caption
- Make the word features stand out more
- Instead of 2010’s change it to of the year
- Fix grammar mistakes
- Change the picture of Alyssa to a different model
- Just say the number not page then the number
- Change the font for “Omen”.
- Fix the spacing of the headline
- Put a quote with the insert
- Move the “I” up to fit the paragraph.
This is the verbal feedback I received on my article from Nic.
- Fix punctuation, take out some commas and add full-stops
- add some quotations on some sentences as if the star is talking
- Take out any repetition
- Filter out the stand first, some of it might not be necessary
Here I’ve decided to do my double page article as an interview kind of format where the journalist ask the star questions involving their recent events, I did this for I felt that because my target audience is mainly in the 20 – 30 age group this kind of article would appeal to them the most. As shown this is a brainstorm of what I could include in the interview and what it would be about.
- The journalist is made aware in this through how they refer to James Lavelle in the third person time telling the reader that he the journalist is the one talking about James, in addition whenever he uses a quote from James Lavelle the journalist will use the term “he says” to show that it’s him not talking then but in the rest of the article it is. The impact that this has is that it gives the reader the sense that they are being told a story by someone else instead of just reading it by themselves, because of the terms the journalist uses and how they refer to the whole extract in the the third person is as if they are reading the story to the reader.
- Through the words that the journalist use, we as the audience can get a sense of location through what words they use, this is done by them saying dates and the places to tell us what the setting of the time they are talking about, in addition they quotes from James Lavelle to expand on the sense of location like “a fucking amazing night” which adds the the atmosphere of that part of the biography that the journalist is trying to tell the audience as they will experience a better understanding of where the biography is set. In addition this is also used to tell the audience about the person that the journalist is writing about, again the quotes are used to do this for gives the reader a sense of personality however the journalist also uses adjectives to do this for example when he says “He was the hipster geek” giving the reader a more clear description about who they are reading about and makes it more entertaining to read rather than just reading a bland story about someone the reader barely knows about.
In conclusion the writer represents James Lavelle through how they tell his story in this biography, using quotes that seem to be part of James’ normal vocabulary gives the audience a better representation of him while also writing about the events in his life makes it seem as if we were there adds the the representation making it an entertaining read for the audience.
This is the feedback on the drafts of each of my magazine pages from Mrs Cobb, these are the targets that I have been given to improve my magazine pages:
Front cover: Edit the pug, add better captions that go with the insets, make the barcode smaller, add capitals and more explanation to “the best rock bands”, change plug to a banner.
Context page: Correct grammar, make inset bigger, adjust captions, add or get rid of one of the pictures, add a couple of pages.
Double page spread: Adjust on the column structure and form, have byline say who photo is by and who the text is by.
This is my improved draft of my double page spread. The changes I made on this draft were based on the feedback given to me by Mrs Cobb. Tom improve the layout and give it a better and more smooth look I moved the star image to the left side more and wrapped the text around him, in addition I added more paragraphs with headers. With the text so it would be more appropriate and make more sense I changed the main headline and took out unneeded text.