What I changed: 

• the age of my artist
• the description of the bistro
• added some reported speech
• added information about one of her songs
• added some personal opinions from the journalist

Click on image to see full article

What will my changes bring to the article?

• social interaction and personal identity for the reader
• allow the reader to connect and relate to the artist

Targets:

• change the language so it has a more formal tone