My first draft corrections:

I read through my double-page spread article in order to check for any spelling or punctuation mistakes and to also make sure that it reads well. By doing this, I have found some things that I need to adapt and change:

• spelling and punctuation
• sentence structure
• finding adjectives for words so I don’t repeat them
• the natural flow of the article

Second draft:

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Targets for development: 

• be more specific on the location – make it personal to the artist
• add some reported speech to make it a bit more varied – e.g. went on to explain a stpry of her youth (can then go back to verbatim speech)
• mention one of the songs in a little more detail
• comments/observations from the journalist
• add some personal journalist opinion/reference at the end