This was my first draft of my article before editing –

The life of Alice. Alice grew up by the beach with her family until her life took a massive turn. ‘I lived with my mum and sister alongside the beach. Living on an island was so beautiful, filled with different experiences’.  Not many people get to experience island life, so this gave Alice a different perspective on life. She has many ordinary hobbies; and an ordinary life, as she tells us we also find out a secret  ‘It’s surprisingly really as, me and Ruby meetup daily and go to gym classes, and well, this is where I met my mystery friend.’ Now we know she goes out with her childhood friend Ruby and we also find out about her mystery friend who she was seen spotted with on November 2nd. The star also reveals her nightlife with friends, just like the other night she was spotted in ‘Cielo club’ with Ruby and Drake.‘That was such a fun night out, Drake is one of my good friends I met through music as he was in the studio one day when I turned up and we just became friends then on.’ A big question asked was what are the plans for the future, and we were not left disappointed! Future plans were a big topic since Alice is a new uprising star with passion to inspire. ‘I have big plans for the future, I want my music to be heard worldwide and become inspirational.’ Current predictions and rumours are that Alice will be going on a world wide tour and do big concerts. The star is also going to be dropping a new song soon even though the release of her album has just launched. Her lyrics are known to be ‘from the heart’ and ‘relatable’ to an age raging audience. ‘Family is so important to me, they honestly kept me going on my darkest days and I don’t think I would be where I am without them.’ The way Alice expresses herself, and through her lyrics as well, displays how she has faced many difficulties throughout her life and continues to get stronger from them. ‘The world isn’t ready for what is about to come.’ This Suggests she has something special planned maybe even linking with the tour. We asked how Alice is finding life having it change so quick and she dropped a bomb on us! ‘It all came at once really, reality still hasn’t hit, I have given my all so far but the biggest secret will soon unfold!’ This raised many questions but she didn’t reveal anything, but left us with this thought which explains who Alice really is, ‘Family is so important to me, they honestly kept me going on my darkest days and I don’t think I would be where I am without them.’

Now I have re read and changed to develop my article and this is my new improvement. Also when developing I created a voice memo  to be able to read aloud to hear my mistakes. 

Here is my voice memo of corrections –

 

My Targets:

• Add in more punctuation/ structure
• Change some words
• Put grabbing words in bold
• Add more detail